Why is it when you quit smoking you feel on top of the world and you just have the inhaler to take a lug if you need but for people to rattle your cage to the stage you want to go buy some fags but you know you will kick yourself if you do that after all the hard work you have put into doing this course so you have to find another way to deal with this angry inside when people make you want to have a fag but you have to be better than them because people said you would do it but you have shown them that you can do anything that you put your mind and don’t go for that fag because you will have yourself for doing it 


Why oh why as soon as you put your makeup on to try and lift your self up and make yourself feel good people say why are you wearing makeup your turn and say because I can and thenow they well you don’t normally isn’t a women aloud to be different to try and make herself happy or people say did your do your makeup because it’s to good to be done by you for god sake people know how to knock people when they already are down 


I sit by the river and hear the water trickling down the river and hear the weeds swaying from side to side and see the little boats travelling down stream and see the people who are fishing trying to get a catch on the line of there fishing rods they sit there so quite and still and you hear the laughter and the gigging of children playing and you see people sitting in the beer garden having a quick drink and the the children have a quick play on the park that’s in the beer garden before then all leave to go home 


I sit in the house on my own think how quite the house is and miss hearing the laughter of child and the gigging that the children do when there having fun with one another i feel sad because it’s quite and the only think I hear is birds chatting to each other